Saturday, December 29, 2007

Riddle me this...

Take a look at this picture.

You may think it is a female cow, but nooooo. This is a male cow. With female parts. This is Otis the Cow from Nickelodeon's Back at the Barnyard. It's a pretty funny show, but I can't get past the fact that the MALE cow has an udder. Why, oh why?

Ok. So, here's me to my eldest: "Is that a boy or a girl cow?"
Big A: "Boy."
Me: "Why does it have an udder? You know udders have milk. Girl cows give milk, not boy cows."
Big A: "Yeah. But this is a boy cow."
Me: "I don't get it."
Big A: "It's just a cartoon, mom."

And then she rolled her eyes. Apparently, the hermaphrodite cow doesn't bother her at all.

Maybe it's not really a hermaphrodite... After all, I don't see any male genetalia. Maybe this cow is a girl cow and her inner bull is coming out.


Hélène Boudreau said...

Wouldn't something like that come up in the production meetings?

Maybe it went something like this:

Bubba: You think the kids will notice that the bull has an udder?

Seth: I think it's important to be inclusive. Why shouldn't a male cow have an udder? Bulls have been oppressed for far too long.

Jane: But the very definition of a cow is the mature female of cattle.

Bill: I beg to differ, Merriam Webster defines a cow as a a domestic bovine animal regardless of sex or age.

Seth: Which brings me back to the theme of inclusivity.

Jane: But that doesn't negate the fact that males don't have breasts.

Bill: What about man boobies?

Jane nudges Bill with a hard jab to the ribs.

Bill: Wha?

A hush descends over the boardroom. All eyes are trained on Bubba. Bubba is awash with memories of achingly awkward moments at the community pool.

Bubba stands, adjusts his shirt, then snaps his briefcase shut before leaving the room.

Bubba: The udder stays. *sniff*

Hélène Boudreau said...


Bush Babe (of Granite Glen) said...

OK you've hit a nerve in this household... my kids have this movie and they love it. They love the music and the story and sometimes question what the pink thing is. They know what udders are but they are usually nicely tucked away. But I CANNOT watch it. Bulls with udders. What the???

Just too ludicrous - how in the name of all that is normal, can a team of people have OK'd this? Is male genetalia too offensive? Why have it at all?? My kids will be fine - they have the real thing wandering around outside their house to right their perceptions. But city kids? Will be wondering what the hey is underneath that weird looking cow with NO UDDER!!!

OK - off my soapbox now. I'm off to google hermaprodite cow.